Woman of the Week

ELAINE WILSON

Elaine Wilson is a sherpa, mom, chief inspiration officer and insight prodigy—a fancy-pants name for intuitive! She received her B.A. in journalism. She’s worked in broadcast, corporate marketing and agency and continues to freelance write and consult. Her knack is figuring out how to take the tired and make it inspired.  She currently lives in Minneapolis with her husband, two boys and two dogs and currently works for a media/PR company. Elaine buys wine based solely on the label design. She lives for skiing, travel and cooking—but doesn’t have the time to do any of it. Elaine is a true mentor and fun connection. ejw.wilson@gmail.com or

http://www.linkedin.com/pub/elaine-wilson/3/747/987

ELAINE WILSON

“Negotiation? It wasn’t on my radar as a young woman. In fact, I don’t think I knew it “existed.” As an easily satisfied, cheerful optimist, I could have used somebody to give me that  wink, nudge or ‘heads up’ telling me that in life you don’t need to be content with what you “get” and simply be thankful all the time!

Little did I know that eventually my character, education, gut instincts and dangerous curiosity would unleash a world I never knew existed where you get to ASK!. Negotiation came naturally but it tests my courage, keeps me challenged and reminds me everyday that I’m in charge of my own destiny.

My wake-up call came when I was working in the marketing department for a national bank, immersed in details while coordinating a major acquisition. Suddenly my boss was laid off and the executive team told me I would now be in charge. That was it. They left the room and I thought to myself #$%^&! I was young, never managed, still had a junior title and now had a full plate thrown onto my lap.

Thankfully leadership and my “do good drive” kicked in. But after 30 days it hit me! I was doing three times the work, making the same money and still had a junior title. It made me feel like crap—it wasn’t right.

So I gathered up the courage to meet with the president. I outlined my accomplishments and briefed him on what was ahead—a launching pad to then ask for the salary my boss had, her title and permission to hire one more employee.

The look on his face? Scary!  And I’ll never forget the silence. Suddenly the president bopped his fist on the table and with a smirk said, “fine.” I think he was relieved I actually asked and maybe thought, “What took you so long?” That was a turning point for me.

The big wins I remember are so small in scale—but I think the significance lies in the “feelings” that come with the outcome:

  • Negotiating on a ridiculously expensive golf outfit in an exclusive pro shop that I really, really wanted, but didn’t fit my budget. Rather than walk away, I asked for a discount and got it.
  • When I was the Promotion Director at a TV station and my general manager said I couldn’t have any promo spots in the Super Bowl. He didn’t want to sacrifice the revenue. I was furious. So I produced my best spot ever promoting our news, weather and sports. I showed it to him, made my case on the benefit of running the spot–and he said “yes!” I fought for what was right for the station and ended up with a personal win—the spot won an award.

Our approach is different than men. Our natural charm, motherly instincts to protect, creativity and sociability naturally leads to negotiation–all day everyday. I just think we work harder at it. We identify more opportunities, stick our necks out and use our natural abilities to commit to the process. I don’t think we’ve realized how far we can go.

I think negotiation is a mindset that you should incorporate into your daily life.  Recognize the tools you have and use them! My success is based on me being me. My gut is my compass. And my outgoing, competitive, compassionate nature is the power that helps me navigate.

I think negotiation is a lot of fun. And maybe our advantage is that we just don’t take it as seriously as men? But it needs to be fun—and we need to share our negotiation successes with each other. It’s like sharing skin care regimens or great book titles. We talk about it, we get excited and we gain the confidence to try something new.”